Wanna know what happens when you take Will Ferrell’s advice from Wedding Crashers and throw in a bunch of other weirdness? You get this gem of a story. In 2016, 19-year old Gary Hardwick married 72-year old Almeda Errell. Gary had previously been dating a 77 year-old woman before that.
Dude was barely old enough to drive when he decided that dollar-store Joy Behar was his soulmate and hasn’t looked back. He is actually younger than one of Almeda’s grandsons and describes himself as “very mature for his age”.
If this wasn’t weird enough already, wait until you hear about how they met. Almeda claims she instantly fell in love with Gary when she locked eyes with him at her 45 year-old son’s funeral. She says that she knew he was “the one” from the moment she laid eyes on him.
After the funeral, she couldn’t stop thinking about Gary for months. They didn’t see each other again until a Chuck-E-Cheese birthday party where they bonded super well. Who needs Tinder when you’ve got funerals and Chuck-E-Cheese?
Gary was enamored by her “gorgeous blue eyes” and proposed to her after two weeks of dating. Power move to say the least.
Gary here is what I imagine Sid from Toy Story became when he grew up. I mean, can’t you see the resemblance?
In our timeline, he eventually ran out of toys to torture and realized that getting a job was too much effort. Still, he needed a source of income. At this point, he decided to draw that beard on himself with a sharpie and search for a source of income. He eventually realized that manipulating lonely, elderly women was his best chance to get paid and started GILF hunting.
As weird and creepy as Gary is, he’s still higher up in the Hardwick power-rankings than Chris Hardwick in my book.